surviving abuse


For a lot of my life I have squashed and suppressed all emotion – there was a lot anger and self hatred though, for various reasons.   I learned very quickly in life to get control of myself, to force my emotions into non-existence.  That was a survival mechanism. And it worked, until it didn’t.   

There’s lots of self help books on “defining yourself” – whatever that means.  I’m seeking less definition.   On having less boundaries, and being okay with that, on having less soul-crushing emotional control, but also not having an emotional breakdown.  It’s hard to find a balance, so for me, it’s baby-steps into unknown emotional territory.  

I try very hard to avoid labels.  Not to label myself, and not to label other people also. Labels come with expectations and excuses.  



Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s